Opening to love
“I write poetry as well as read it not because I’m a pro, but because it’s the best form of self-therapy I know.”
When a friend lost her beloved unexpectedly several weeks ago, I was overcome with emotion—desperate sadness and concern for her but also sadness at remembering my own losses over the years. I know grief. Not this particular grief, which is unimaginable to me, but grief nonetheless.
That day, the day I received the heartbreaking news about my friend’s loss, I took to my journal to give voice to my feelings, to honor the grief, to pray for my friend. When I thought I was written (and cried) out, I put down my pen and paper and walked away. Feelings and words continued to dance in my head and I soon realized the words were arranging themselves into a poem.
I’m not a poet. I have previously only ever written one poem in my life when I was 16 years old. Here is what poured out of my heart that day:
Opening to Love
You open your heart to love
Just a little
Slowly you begin to trust that love
Just a little
Days turn into weeks
turn into months
turn into years
Little by little
You no longer question love
It just is
Then, suddenly, the source of that love is stolen from you
But love remains
And little by little
Your heart breaks open
There is so much love
Let it in
Lean on it
Find strength, comfort and hope in it
And little by little
Love heals
I have struggled with whether or not to share this poem publicly. I deeply respect my friend’s privacy, and I don’t want to intrude. In truth, though, this poem isn’t just about and for her. It expresses my hope for every one of us. That when life throws tragedy in our wake, we are able to turn toward love to show us how to heal and to move on knowing that love is always with us, showing us the way.
My friend Kristi said it so eloquently: “It makes me think of love in the spiritual sense and how it is everywhere, coming from so many sources. I didn't really feel that until I went through my last few years of challenges. That knowing is a true gift of heartbreak and loss … opening to that universal sense of love.”
